Showing posts with label happy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label happy. Show all posts

Sunday, June 29, 2014

The answer to life, the universe and everything... is 42.

Life isn't a competition. It isn't about who gets the most hits in at the end, who wins, or whose stats are better. It isn't about who has the newer car, the bigger house, or more gadgets. It isn't about who always looks the freshest, seems the most organized, or has the most caring partner. It's about happiness. And happiness isn't what we think it is.

It isn't regretting the past; its taking to heart the things we would do differently. It isn't the endless shoulda-woulda-couldas; its knowing what we will do next time.
It isn't obsessing over the possibilities once we achieve our goal, its being grateful for our focus. It isn't praying for the crying to stop, it's taking the opportunity to soothe your child. Happiness isn't telling yourself you'll be satisfied with your house once it's clean, it's realizing the blessing of your own space. It isn't that we can't wait until... happiness is being content with your now.

I tell myself, "once I get a husband, raising Devonney will be easier". No, it won't. It will present it's own set of difficulties. It is easy now. I just need to take one moment at a time and breathe and love on her.

I tell myself, "once I make more money, I will be excited with all my cool stuff". Uh, what do I care about cool stuff? My stuff does what it needs to do. My laptop Skypes and gets on the internet, my car drives, my clothes fit, my phone (generally) works. That's all pretty cool haha!

I think, "I'll be more satisfied with the house once it's clean". Um, no, it's pretty perfect now. I still like it when it's messy. I can clean it later!

Sometimes I freak out when Devonney throws a fit in the middle of the night. Every pore is screaming for her to be quiet, I'm exhausted, and I really, really don't want that to be my life at that moment. But if I can just perspective for a second, instead of snapping at her or putting her down to cry in the room, I look at her little heartbroken, confused face. I hold her tight and hum in her ear, "mama's here, mama's got you" and you know what? She stops crying. That's all I have to do. That's it. This is the one time in her life it will be so easy to console her. I need to embrace that.

I will say to myself, "once I have my degree, I will be able to afford a good nanny for Devonney, and that will solve all my childcare issues". As if I will ever feel just as comfortable leaving her with someone as I do when I am caring for her! Silly!

I know you tell yourself things like this. We all do. It is okay to have hopes, dreams, plans, and goals. It's good to be excited about the future! But it is more important to embrace your now. This is the only now you will ever have. You could die tomorrow, your child could die tomorrow, you could become a paraplegic, you could discover cancer. Please, please, have some perspective and see your blessings. When you smile with positivity, you will realize you can't even count all your blessings. It's not about your situation as you would better it, it's not about all the stress on your plate, it's about all the wonderful things you experience every day. It's just a matter of seeing them when they're right in front of you.

Sunday, March 16, 2014

I'm a shameless beggar!

Hello y'all,
Hope all is well with you. Devonney and I are doing great. Obviously the things I am able to do have changed with my mini-me in the picture.
One of the things I am not completely able to do right now is volunteer at my favorite summer camp: Royal Family Kids Camp in Big Bear. I have every intention of returning in the future and have greatly enjoyed maintaining friendships forged "on the mountain" in the meantime. Instead of counseling or trying to attend with/without the wee one, I'm sending out this letter to ask friends and family to think of camp this year (big tax refund, maybe? ;)) financially.
Royal Family Kids Camp is an amazing place. It happens by the grace of God every year. Just enough money flows in and just enough people volunteer at just the right time to make it happen. Most of the campers are living in dependancy care in a foster home or with extended family. Many of them, even at the ages of seven to eleven, have a history of abuse or neglect. They do not live in the suburbs; and they could definitely last longer in downtown LA than you or I could.
These children have had to grow up much faster than any child should have to, because of their harsh realities. When they get on the bus, they're all swagger and sway, little children emulating the adults they see in their neighborhood. But by the second day, they're realizing that no one at camp is here to judge them, hurt them, or ignore them. Their pure child spirits start to show, and by the end of our always-too-short week, there's been growth. Unfortunately, they have to go back to their home (or lack of one) and I know they often don't maintain their rediscovered innocence for long. But we pray they will come back next year.
RFKC has made an incredible impact on my life and so many childrens' lives. Some siblings only see each other once a year at camp. It's the only place these children are absolutely loved and safe; no matter what they do, they are gently and lovingly corrected.
Please, please consider Royal Family Kids' Camp in your prayers and your finances this year. Visit www.kidsnetla.org. ANY AMOUNT is helpful; every single dollar!  
Thank you,
Jessie